so last night in my discipleship group, my girls and i were discussing some chapters from big truths for young hearts. we were discussing the idea that god needs nothing from us and he chooses to love us and make himself known to us, even though he knew we would leave him and reject him. as we were talking about it we started talking about the many implications that has for our lives. one of them really hit my little pharisaical hear to the core.
sometimes i view my time with god as something i do. i must do. i would never actually describe it that way. i am too christian to do that. :) but that feeling of i have to do this stems from the idea that god some how needs me to do this. like if i do this, he can now work through me. like it was holding back his sovereign power. part of me deep down still thinks it will bring his approval too. but i already have his approval, his steadfast and unending love.
i've got it backwards. my "quiet time" or time spent in prayer and in the word is for my benefit, not his. i have a god who has chosen to reveal himself to me and those times in the prayer and in the word are so that i may know him! i get to know him! how often i forget what a privilege that is! it is not just something to do or some resource to tap or something to gain good standing, it is for my benefit. i have the chance to sit down anfd learn about this god of mysteries. a chance to commune with him, talk with him and even ask him for things. funny how when my heart believes this is true, i am excited and even long to spend time in prayer. sadly for most of my life, a quiet time was a burden. something that i knew would be good for me, but i still felt like it was just something god wanted his children to do. what a sweet reminder of the privilege it is that god reveals himself to us and we get to approach his throne and know him!